Category: 1982


The Thing (1982)

MOVIES & MANIA

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‘Man is the warmest place to hide’

The Thing (also known as John Carpenter’s The Thing) is a 1982 American science fiction horror film directed by John Carpenter (Halloween, The Fog), written by Bill Lancaster, and starring Kurt Russell (They Live, Escape From New York). The film’s title refers to its primary antagonist: a parasitic extraterrestrial life-form that assimilates other organisms and in turn imitates them. The Thing infiltrates an Antarctic research station, taking the appearance of the researchers that it absorbs, and paranoia develops within the group.

The film is based on John W. Campbell, Jr.’s 1938 novella Who Goes There?, which was more loosely adapted by Howard Hawks and Christian Nyby as the 1951 film The Thing from Another World. Carpenter considers The Thing to be the first part of his Apocalypse Trilogy, followed by Prince of Darkness 

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Hospital Massacre

Really Awful Movies

Hospital_MassacreThe tagline is…There’s no recovery room at…Hospital Massacre…but shouldn’t it be Massacre Hospital? It’s also known as X-Ray and Ward 13 so perhaps there were some creative differences early on.

You want back-story?! You got it! A boy leaves a Valentine’s Day card for the prettiest girl in school and when he’s rebuffed, he strings her brother up on a hat rack.

Fast-forward (as you might be inclined to do anyway because of the less than stellar performances) a few decades and she’s all grown up and portrayed by playboy model and Hee Haw regular Barbi (yes) Benton who goes in for what is supposed to be a routine checkup….and

You want foreshadowing? You got it!
Her friend David: “Isn’t this the hospital where they had all  the trouble last year? Some patient ran amok or something.”

Hospital_MassacreKetchup mistaken for blood, dripping from the sandwich of a drunk?…

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Turkey Shoot (1982)

turkey-shoot-1982

Faster pussycatI took a week off, but we’re back.  The “right side” of the original bracket is decided: Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill! (1965) has beat out all the competition over there, especially I Drink Your Blood (1970); She-Devils On Wheels (1968); Blacula (1972); and Ilsa, She-Devil of the SS (1975), which Faster took on directly.

This week, we wrap on the “Left Side” conference pitting two real works of art against one another. These are different kinds of movies from different eras, so a hard choice.  The winner takes on the Russ Meyers masterpiece of exploitation, above:

See you next week for the last match-up!

 

This week something happened in Match-Up 6 that I had not anticipated: a tie.  So, we’ll re-compete that one (Day the Earth Stood Still vs. Black Sunday).  Also, the first shut-outs of our competition so far!  Here’s how it shook out last week:

Day the Earth Stood Still–1 vote (50%)
Black Sunday (this week’s “Movie of the Week,” coincidentally)–1 vote (50%)

Carnival of Souls–4 votes (100%)
Grizzly

The Thing–3 votes (100%)
The Birds

Witchfinder General–2 votes (67%)
Them!–1 vote (33%)

I Drink Your Blood–3 votes (100%)
Christine

The Exorcist–3 votes (75%)
ThanksKilling–1 vote (25%)

Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill!–3 votes (75%)
Blacula–1 vote (25%)

She-Devils on Wheels–3 votes (75%)
Toxic Avenger–1 vote (25%)

All of the above carnage brings us here.  So, here are this week’s matches:

The Re-Match!

Kurt Russell or Vincent Price?

Satan/ists!

Exploitation-palooza!

Next time, Final Four!

At this point, we’ve eliminated half of the films we started with, and have arrived at our Sweet 16! But before we get to that story, I have to go over this story–how Match-Up 4 shook out.

This Story 

Match-up 4 had about half the votes of 3, which is fine, and here’s how it all went down:

Hi-Brow vs. Low-Brow Horror

The Birds (1963)–3 votes (60%)
Night of the Lepus (1972)–2 votes (40%)

Come All Ye Witchfinders!

Witchfinder General (1968)–3 votes (60%)
Mark of the Devil (1970)–2 votes (40%)

Possessions ‘R Us

The Exorcist (1973)–3 votes (60%)
The Devil Rides Out (1968)–2 votes (40%)

Exploitations’ Best Leading Ladies

Faster Pussycat, Kill! Kill! (1965)–3 votes (60%)
Ilsa, She-Wolf of the SS (1975)–2 votes (40%)

That Story

So, with these we have our Sweet 16.  This week we’ll work through these eight matches, so we can get at a Final Four next time out:

The Day the Earth Stood Still (1951):

vs.

Black Sunday (1960)

Grizzly (1976)

vs.

Carnival of Souls (1962)

The Thing (1982)

vs.

The Birds (1963)

Them! (1954)

vs.

Witchfinder General (1968)

Christine (1983)

vs.

I Drink Your Blood (1970)

ThanksKilling (2009)

vs.

The Exorcist (1973)

Blacula (1972)

vs.

Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill! (1965)

Toxic Avenger (1984)

vs.

She-Devils on Wheels (1968)

Happy Voting, see you at the Elite Eight next week!

Happy Birthday Ted Mikels!

Tedandfan-webTo celebrate Ted Mikels‘ 85th birthday today, enjoy this great and long interview with the master exploiteer–who directed such classics as 10 Violent Women (1982), The Astro-Zombies (1968), and The Doll Squad (1973)–courtesy of Nerdlocker!

PS: I want that sweater!

  

It’s that time of the week again! Time for results and new contests to find some of the more popular B-movies, as voted on by my 7 loyal followers.  First, a wrap-up of last week’s contest:

Battle of the Crazy 70s Cult Leaders!

  • I Drink Your Blood (1970)–6 votes (67%)
  • Children Shouldn’t Play With Dead Things (1973)–2 votes (33%)

A Troma Classic v. Vengeful Christmas Trees

  • The Toxic Avenger (1984)–8 votes (89%)
  • Treevenge (2008)–1 votes (11%)

Horror: 1960s v. 1970s

  • Black Sunday (1963)–7 votes (78%)
  • The Abominable Dr. Phbes–2 votes (22%)

Sci-Fi: 1950s v. 1960s

  • Them (1954)–5 votes (56%)
  • Godzilla vs. The Thing (1964)–4 votes (44%)

Now that we have two sets of results, we need to start charting who’s advancing on from the original 32 films into a Sweet 16. For those following along at home, here’s where we’re at–and you can start to see what upcoming match-ups will be.   And now, on with the countdown!

This week, four more matches, notable for how very different each match-up is, but all these films are worth a re-watch.  Here are the matches for this week:

1960s Horror Pioneers

These represent some groundbreaking horror film making whose styles and tropes remain with us, even after half a century. Both are top faves of mine: Carnival of Souls (1962) vs. Blood Feast (1963). The latter is Herschell Gordon Lewis’s second entry into our little contest, after She-Devils on Wheels won its first contest handily.

John Carpenter Bake-Off!

Every rightly-brought-up fan loves John Carpenter, but which of his films are his best?  Here, we must make a hard choice: The Fog (1980) vs. The Thing (1982)!

Contemporary Zero-Budget Nightmares

I love zero-budgets (z-movies) almost as much as the classics, and we are indeed in a new golden age for this end of the swamp.  I’ll unilaterally give an honorable mention to Bong of the Dead (2011), but for this week make your choice between these two new classics:

Blaxploitation Still Rules

Love me some classic blaxploitation! For whatever reason, this is a genre that I cannot tire of.  Two more faves, though I really wanted to get Dolemite or Bucktown in for this year–these might be a good match-up for next year’s edition of the Grindhouse Brackets. But for this year, puzzle me this: Blacula (1972) or Shaft (1971)?

Next week, we’ll finish up the initial contests where each of the 32 starters has an initial shot at advancement–after next week things will start getting interesting as winners take on other winners.

 

 

 

And she lived to tell about it! I must try this soon!

Stigmatophilia's gore splattered corner of insanity.

In honour of cult UK label 88 Films releasing two Ted V Mikels films in the same week, The Doll Squad and The Corpse Grinders, I woke up with possibly one of my most inspired/ or silliest (depending on what your stance on shlock z-grade movie making is) ideas I have ever had. Not only will I be providing you lovely folks with full reviews of the aforementioned 88 Films releases, but I decided it was time for a Ted V Mikels movie marathon, 6 films in 12 hours. Would I survive with my brain cells intact? Would I ever be the same again? Read on to find out what happened….

The Black Klansman (1966)

klan 1
I start the day out right with a good piece of social commentary, Ted V Mikels style, in The Black Klansman aka Brute aka a whole bunch of other names (depending on the possibility of…

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This triumph premiered on this day (April 1) in 1982.  Enjoy!